Moo-Ma & Moo-Pa is the is the third episode of the third series of Black Books. The story consists of Manny's parents (Moo-Ma and Moo-Pa) coming to stay for the weekend, and the lies he's told them throw Fran and Bernard's lives into chaos.
In the shop, Bernard goes through the messages on the answerphone and deletes Manny's calls (including one from his friend Paul inviting him and "Pam or Sam" along to the "Annual Reggae Barbeque", but "please don't bring that grumpy irish bas-"). When Manny comes in moments later, Bernard claims that he hasn't recieved any calls, despite Manny saying he was expecting something. Fran then comes in to tell Manny that she recieved the call from Paul, but because Bernard deleted the call, Manny doesn't know about it. Fran then notices that a red light is flashing on the answerpohne, and despite Bernard's insistance that it means "it needs more salt", Fran plays the message. Mary Bianco, his mother has called to say that she telephoned to ask if it was okay to for her and his father could stay for the weekend, and Bernard presumably having deleted the call without listening to it, they assumed it was okay. Manny, realising that they will be on route at that moment, pleads with Bernard to let them stay. Bernard declines, saying he doesn't "want [his] house... infected with the kind of specimins capable of producing [Manny]." Fran, however, takes him into the back room and forces Bernard to let them stay by telling him that she knows he's been screening Manny's calls. Manny is at first relieved to hear the good news, but then reacts by having a panic attack (which Bernard tries to cure by sitting him in a chair, getting him into a headlock, and shouting "STOP DYING!" at him).
Later on, Manny is trying to clean the house but realises it is an exercise in futility when Fran pops in and shows him the Indian Throw Rug- covering the messes with sheets. When they arrive, they annoy everybody constantly- Mo-Ma's constant cracking her fingers, and Moo-Pa always talking endlessly about nothing and humming the first few brs of "Chatanooga Choo-Choo". Things aren't helped by the fact that Manny has been lying about life in Black Books- he said that Bernard has made him a partner and Fran was his girlfriend. Things finally go too far when Manny and Fran find themselves half-asleep on the sofa while Moo-Ma and Moo-Pa run the shop and Bernard wakes up with washed clothes, clean sheets and had been shaved. Bernard and Fran force Manny to get them to leave. He eventually manages it but feels so guilty in the process that he arranges to spend a week off with them to "catch up". After they've gone, Manny breathes a sigh of relief, until Bernard reminds him that he will be spending a week with them, then both he and Fran tease him by cracking their knuckles and humming "Chatanooga Choo-Choo".