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Thick as Thieves
Publication information

Danny Spudge


2001 (likely)


Danny Spudge


Black Books



"A Rogue's Tale"
—The book's subtitle

Thick as Thieves is an autobiographical book written by Danny Spudge, following his life as a gangster and a thug. As Danny is illiterate, the book was ghostwritten by 'the bloke who did the Spice Girls book'.


Published work[]

"A lot of people think I'm a thug. That's very upsetting. That's why I did the book. Get a few things straight."
—Danny's reasons for writing Thick as Thieves

Thick as Thieves was likely to be written in 2001. It was ghostwritten by 'the bloke who did the Spice Girls book', as Danny Spudge wass illiterate at the time. Gus, Danny's uncle, arranged a book reading in Black Books, an eponymous bookshop run by Bernard Black and his assistant Manny Bianco. Danny insisted that Bernard and Manny teach him how to read before the book reading, and as he threatened them with killing them and their mothers, Bernard and Manny obliged.

The reading lessons didn't work out, and day's before the reading, Danny had learnt next to nothing about the English language. However, Fran Katzenjammer used her assertive attitude to force Danny to read, and eventually Danny learnt how to read and write.

Audio book[]

"I kept his ear in my pocket for a month. I used to chew it at parties. Gets you noticed, I can tell you."

Danny, Bernard, Fran, and Manny made an unianimous decision to abandon the reading and to use Danny's newfound reading skills to convert some of the books in the shop into audio books, with Danny as narrotor. These books included Don DeLillo's Underworld and Jane Austen's Pride and Prejudice. It is likely that Danny recorded an audio book of Thick as Thieves as well.


Notes and references[]